Child Support and Parenting Time
Jason Freeman - Denver Family Law Attorney
One of the most common misconceptions about child support and parenting time is that, if either is denied to a parent, this gives the other parent leeway to deny the other. For example, Mom does not pay Dad child support, so Dad withholds parenting time. The inverse of this, Dad denies parenting time, so Mom does not pay child support, is an equally unreasonable assumption in the eyes of the law.
One of the saddest telephone calls I frequently receive are from someone saying, “I wasn’t able to afford child support after I lost my job, so I haven’t been allowed to see my child for a couple years, and now my ex is going after me for back support.” This is sad in on many different levels. First, this child has been deprived of a parent for way too long. Second, this deprivation is founded on bad information. Third, two years later, after the psychological damage a child experiences from having a parent removed from his life, the child support is still owed. Fourth, it may have been possible to modify the child support obligation, and fifth, courts tend to not be so sympathetic to parents who are viewed as walking out of a child’s life and disregarding child support. A reintegration period for that parent with the child may be necessary for the emotional well-being of the child, and, in addition to owing back support, interest may be added on to the debt.
With the above in mind, it also makes sense that, if Dad is refusing child’s parenting time with Mom, then refusing to pay child support is not a good way for Mom to retaliate. As the support obligation is not alleviated by Dad’s refusal to comply with orders for parenting time, that sort of retaliation will only end with Mom continuing to not see child and owing back support plus interest.
Sometimes, there is a threatening aspect to the situation. For example, Mom tells Dad that if he tries to enforce parenting time, then she will sue him for back child support. As a general rule of thumb, it’s not good to encourage the threats of the other parent by giving in to them. This usually just results in more threats and abusive behavior. Here, there is no exception. If Dad gives in to this threat, the most likely result will be that Mom waits until child is older, and then she sues Dad for the back support.
There are ways to avoid these traps. If Dad denying Mom’s parenting time in violation of a court order, then a motion to enforce that parenting time may be filed. If no orders are in place for parenting time, then a Petition may be filed to seek Court Ordered establishment of defined parenting time. If Mom stops paying child support, it is a better option for Dad to seek enforcement of the support order than deny Mom parenting time. One, denying parenting time for that reason is most likely not in the children’s best interest. Two, if Mom acts appropriately and files a motion to enforce her parenting time, the Court may very well frown on Dad for this behavior.
Also, if circumstances change for a parent, and that parent is no longer able to meet a support obligation, then it is best for him to look into whether a motion to modify the support order is warranted, and sooner than later. If the parent owing support has to take a job with a significant pay decrease, the existing order will nonetheless remain in place unless that parent has it modified by Court Order.
